Word of the Year: kindness

The word for 2012 is

Why kindness?
I wanted a concept that was multi-dimensional and one that was challenging for me in some way.
What's more versatile than simple, sweet, and straightforward kindness?

• To self
• To loved ones
• To colleagues
• To acquaintances
• To strangers

Each one of those groups presents its own particular challenge. Let's start with the three in the middle!
Don't you find that kindness to those close by is easier when you know it will be appreciated, or when you're responding with kindness to something nice/helpful/generous that someone else initiated? Part of my challenge will be extending kindness to others without attaching any strings, even invisible ones in my own head.  That sort of detached kindness would be a much more honest expression of my own innate goodwill than the acts of kindness I sometimes do now, hoping for or expecting appreciation and reciprocation, and being resentful when they don't appear.
Kindness to strangers is something I too often let fall by the wayside, simply because I don't have to see or think about the consequences my brief interaction in the checkout line or my easing impatiently past a slow-mover on the sidewalk have.  This year I'd like to challenge myself to be more aware and more mindful of others.
Finally, kindness to self is a creature of a totally different type.  Except I think it's not actually so different from kindness to others.  My personal challenge is to take the kindness I'm so willing to show everyone else and turn it back around to be more patient, more forgiving, and more generous with myself.

Regular Feature
Instead of having a '10 Things' list every Saturday, I'll be sharing a kindness tip once a week - some way to be kind to yourself or others that I've tried and that you can try, too!  A number of these acts of kindness will also involve crafting, because we knitters ought to use our talents and skillz for good, no?  Get ready for the first post coming up on Saturday (fancy new post heading banner TM included).

What does kindness mean to you?  How do you carve out space for kindness in your everyday life?  Or do you have your own inspiring word for 2012?  I'd love for you to share your thoughts in the comments!

10 Things, vol 36

10 Things is my weekly list of things that are making me smile right now. Please share your own grin-inducing items and events in the comments!

1. holiday parties with wonderful friends

2. lots of books to read

3. small gifts from thoughtful people

4. tiramisu cupcakes, take 2 (these are so delicious, I can't even tell you)

5. packing up to go home

6. snow!

7. simple ribbed socks on the needles

8. a large pile of clothes to donate, including a warm winter coat

9. adding the first events of 2012 to my calendar

10. lessons learned and knowledge applied

10 Things, vol 34

10 Things is my weekly list of things that are making me smile right now. Please share your own grin-inducing items and events in the comments!

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1. A surprise guest (okay, that part did not make me smile because it meant being momentarily ashamed of my really messy living room) for playing video games (that part was really fun!)

2. The resulting de-cluttered living room

3. Plus also clean dishes

4. Plans for baking cookies and cupcakes this afternoon

5. Holding the world's cutest babyTM at church yesterday, even if she did spit up on me

6. This ornament kit that I'm so excited to work on after Thanksgiving

by Alicia Paulson

7. Wearing jeans that actually fit all week - hooray for running and buying clothes in smaller sizes!

8. Winter crafts on people's Pinterest boards

9. Reading ahead for my class and getting excited to teach the next section

10. Liam Neeson. Just thought I'd throw that out there.

10 Things, vol. 33

10 Things is my weekly list of things that are making me smile right now.  Please share your own grin-inducing items and events in the comments!

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1. Completing my first official 5k with a decent time this morning :)

2. Ghirardelli chocolate fondue; that stuff is seriously delicious

3. Lots of socks to knit

4. Homemade trail mix with dried cranberries and pistachios

5. People who like knitted gifts

6. Text messages from my sisters

7. A big cup of coffee. Do I write this every week? It's always true.

8. A really busy week finished and a less busy week ahead

9. Catching up with friends I don't see very often

10. Blasting cheerful music while doing chores

for you

just sayin'. 

Hope you had a lovely day!

10 Things, vol 32

10 Things is my weekly list of things that are making me smile right now. Please share your own grin-inducing items and events in the comments!

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1. N is in town for a visit. We've been having the best time catching up and practicing our karaoke moves.

2. Sushi lunch yesterday (thus the picture above; that's not actually my delicious lunch,
but it looks pretty good, too)

3. Hilarious phone calls

4. Knit night tonight!

5. The giant stack of Fall fashion magazines at the hair salon yesterday

6. A new pair of socks on the needles

7. Taking goofy self-portraits

8. New friends

9. Good conversations with new friends

10. And I've still got a whole day today to get myself organized for the craziness of the coming week. Yes!

10 Things, vol 31

 10 Things is my weekly list of things that are making me smile right now. Please share your own grin-inducing items and events in the comments!

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1. Receiving a giant custom socks order on Etsy - so excited to get knitting!

2. Finding an awesome dentist

3. Getting back to my running this week after fully recovering from a cold

4. Choosing music for dancing while washing dishes

5. Having plenty of lazy weekend time planned for today

6. Putting a pint of coffee ice cream in my freezer (I'm out of creamer, so this is
totally going in my coffee this morning)

7. Wearing boots almost every day

8. Anticipating a drainboard full of clean dishes

9. Receiving lots of happy mail this week

10. Reading three amazing books over the last three days
(Peter Filene's The Joy of Teaching changed my whole classroom outlook)

Happy Saturday

Last day to enter the giveaway before I draw a winner tomorrow!

enter, enter, enter

10 Things, vol 30

10 Things is my weekly list of things that are making me smile right now. Please share your own grin-inducing items and events in the comments!

1. first cherry pie of the season, made last night, already 1/4 eaten and thoroughly enjoyed

2. new boots arrived in the mail yesterday, just in time for cold weather outfits

3. sweater progress (one sleeve is almost done)

4. eggs and bacon for breakfast

5. shiny gold stripes on my shirt

6. bread dough rising in the kitchen

7. pinning 1" pins with cute pictures on all my fall jackets and unpacking scarves

8. plans for a productive afternoon

9. finished socks! FO post coming shortly...

10. driving a zippy red car to work on Thursday

So... that list looks a bit food-centric! One of the real joys of getting over being sick is getting one's appetite back, wouldn't you say? This weekend might just have to be all about delicious meals and tasty snacks. What's in the cards for you?

10 Things, vol. 29

10 Things is my weekly list of things that are making me smile right now. Please share your own grin-inducing items and events in the comments!


Woohoo, the weekend was so refreshing! Thank goodness, because this last week was pretty exhausting. I managed to get sick on Thursday, but a few days of sleeping as much as possible seem to have cleared up the worst of it. Now I'm almost back in top form, ready for a productive Monday, and I'm set to share another list of things I'm enjoying.

1. Strawberry Kefir. This stuff is tasty, I tell you.

2. Students who are truly engaged in class discussion

3. Learning a new knitting technique. Thanks to the fab Lauren, I now know how to make a ssk decrease that lays flat (slip 1 knitwise, slip 1 purlwise, pass slipped stitches back to the left-hand needle and k2tog through the back loop - give it a try!)

4. Coffeeeeeeeeeee, always

5. A relaxing afternoon of reading in the park in the sun

6. Texting with one of my favorite people during a slow work shift

7. Laydeez night plans tonight!

8. A stash of, I kid you not, 8 pens in my backpack. It's good to be prepared?

9. A sock knitalong with Pippa (more details and pictures tomorrow)

10. Pairing pink and teal; this is one of my new favorite combos, though perhaps its not entirely Fall-appropriate...

10 Things, volume 28

10 Things is my weekly list of things that are making me smile right now. Please share your own grin-inducing items and events in the comments!

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1. A dinner party with lovely friends last night

2. Followed by a dance party/housewarming with other wonderful people

3. Getting this in Friday's mail from my awesome little brother

4. New socks on the needles (and they're pink!)

5. Being able to do box pose in yoga yesterday - hand balances are getting easier

6. Strategizing with my sister about teaching techniques and class discussions

7. Strawberry Kefir

8. Looking forward to this weekend's retreat

9. Packing tiny hotel shampoo and conditioner bottles in my overnight bag

10. Wearing a scarf for the first time this season

Ways to be strong today

images selected from my favorite board on Pinterest, original sources linked below

Whether you're struggling through a tough day or just looking for a way to make a good day even better, here are some tips that I love for how to find strength in the middle of the everyday (it might be a tiny boost of energy, or it might be like jet propulsion for your afternoon).

1. Make a list of things you're grateful for. Make them small or big, things about the world around you or things about your own body, mind, and spirit. Maybe you're grateful for dreams and ambitions - jot them down and get started on making them happen! Write your list down in pencil on a post-it note, type it up in an e-mail and send it to yourself, or get out the markers and stick the finished product to your fridge.

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2. Stretch your muscles. Go for a walk and enjoy the cool air, or pick up a shampoo bottle and do some bicep curls.  Head to the gym and run until you can't run another step. Put on your favorite playlist and dance around the living room, pumping your arms and spinning until you're dizzy. Just get moving and enjoy how far  your body can carry you.

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3. Hunt for positive influences. Call up your most cheerful friend and ask for a pep talk. Go to the kids' section of your local bookstore and pick up a picture book that makes you smile. Write down the wonderful qualities of a person you admire, then come up with a strategy for how you can emulate that person.

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4. Turn your next task into an adventure.  Whether it's taking out the trash or writing a grant proposal, the next item on your to-do list can be an adventure.  Homework time? Put on your birthday tiara (what, you don't have one of those?) or your fancy socks, and now it's a homework party! Need to hit the grocery store? Challenge yourself to be a cart or basket organizing superhero - do not smash the bread! Put the cans in rainbow order! Seriously, there's no better way to get an energy surge than to turn the ordinary into something extraordinary in your own head.

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Did you take a moment to try one of these? How did it go? Any other tips to share in the comments?

10 Things, vol 27

 10 Things is my weekly list of things that are making me smile right now. Please share your own grin-inducing items and events in the comments!

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1. Kalamata olives (especially as part of a tasty lemon-olive-chicken dish)

2. A great meeting with an instructor I'll be working with starting next week

3. Finding free novels in a streetside giveaway box

4. Working on a new hat design for the shop 

5. The first disc of season 2 of The Vampire Diaries. Hooray for Friday tv-watching marathons!!!

6. Applewood smoked swiss cheese with a honeycrisp apple as an "I just got home from school" snack

7. Pulling out all the handknit socks for fall

8. Finding a full-length mirror for just $17 - bargains make me really happy

9. Monorail kitty on the back of the couch

10. Adding more and more art to the walls

Running: lessons I've learned

1. Running in a regular, heavy-weight t-shirt on a hot day is not advisable.  You will be a horrible sweaty mess, and it will be totally gross when you have to put your backpack on and walk home for 15 minutes. Yuck. Stick to the tissue-thin shirts instead!

2. All this running really helps with making healthy food choices.  When you get home and you're sweaty and tired, all you want to do is refuel with things that are refreshing, to drink a bunch of water and eat some almonds or lean protein (fish, chicken) with lots of spices and some green vegetables.  Long gone are the days of craving potato chips and massive amounts of cheese for dinner.  As Cookie Monster would say, those are "sometimes foods."

3. Keep your ipod charged.  Seriously, I mean it.  When that thing goes kaput in the last 5 minutes of your run, those last 5 minutes will feel like about 20, and you won't be able to trick yourself into keeping your eyes off the mileage indicator or the treadmill clock by saying, "Don't check again until the end of this song." Torture!

4. "Tired" means something very different than it did 6 months ago, and it definitely doesn't mean the same thing as "I need to stop."  Finishing a tough run makes you tired, but also invigorated, and even though you're tired, there's still the extra step of walking home from the gym or climbing the stairs to your apartment or getting on with the rest of the day's business, and you know you have the energy reserves to do it.

5. You can use a whole new set of words to describe yourself.  While you're running, try them on for size:

Powerful.

Dedicated.

Unstoppable.

A force to be reckoned with.

Any runners out there with your own lessons to share?  Are there any words you never thought you would use to describe yourself, and now they seem to fit?  Are there any adjectives you're working for or want to start working for?

In the mood for an adventure

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Today I'm in the mood for an adventure.  I'm craving a hike in the woods, standing on top of big boulders with my hands on my hips, pretending I am queen of the world.  Or maybe a trip to Paris, where I can wander through an art museum and imagine that all the paintings and statues are part of my personal collection.

While travel's not exactly in the cards for this chilly Wednesday, I'm going to become the queen of other things: the kitchen - pumpkin spice cupcakes, knitting - striped armwarmers, and school - planning my class for tomorrow night.  Anything can be an adventure with the right attitude!

What will your Wednesday adventure be?

On not being afraid anymore

I saw this photo on the front page of weheartit the other day, and after an initial, "Yup. I recognize that fear," I realized that in fact I'm not afraid of this anymore. 

On the contrary, lately I've been feeling so much more confident about my ability to make friends, keep friends, and really enjoy the strong and supportive relationships I have in my life.  Most of this confidence-building has been slow, the work of almost a year of therapy, supplemented by six months of yoga and some major, consciously-made changes in my social group.

Therapy and yoga manage to effect the same sort of change in my overall demeanor and attitude; when they're both a part of my week I get verbal and physical affirmation that every bit of effort does make a difference and that I have a major store of strength that can help me accomplish whatever I want to do, if I'm willing to accept that change happens slowly.  Yoga has also been teaching me in a very tangible way the importance of letting go of expecting perfection: my instructor said at one point, "Just give 100%" and it was such a crazy revelation that matched something I had learned in therapy a few weeks earlier, that everything I'm already doing actually is enough, even if not everyone around me perceives it that way.  In so many arenas, we're encouraged or expected to give 110%, to push ourselves to perform perfectly and to do more, even if that means overextending ourselves and sacrificing/overlooking a sense of our own inherent value.  Instead we can choose to participate in activities that require and reward constant effort instead of performance and to surround ourselves with the people who see and appreciate our effort.

Devoting my time to new friends and new kinds of plans has made an incredible difference, too, over the course of this year.  I've been doing my best of avoid those people who are a source of negativity, who are overly critical of others and who consequently drain my energies.  There's a big difference between griping about things that can be changed in order to get yourself motivated to make changes and just griping about everything and continually harping on the things that you can't or shouldn't change, particularly other people.  Over the last month I've made a commitment to myself to avoid the unproductively negative as much as possible.  The result is more energy, more happiness, and more hope, all of which contribute to an overall feeling of gratitude for where I am and confidence about my ability to have the sort of future I want.

In any case, I'm no longer terrified of being left all alone in the end, and it's so freeing.  My more positive attitude allows me to see and be grateful for the people who are around me who are making an effort to be positive and gracious and who notice the effort I make, and I'm no longer trying to twist myself into all sorts of weird shapes in an attempt to please and attract people whose negativity prevents them from appreciating what's around them and would only end up making me feel less-than-valuable anyway.  I'm far more confident that since I am most comfortable and happy being in mutually supportive relationships with people and I'm getting more comfortable with just being myself and noticing the good in others, those kinds of relationships are bound to be part of my life.

Phew, that was a long post! Thanks for reading and for the part you as readers have been playing in this journey. Your supportive comments on reflective posts, your compliments about my knitting and spinning, and your willingness to join in the weekly '10 Things' gratitude lists have been so wonderful!!!

Have you overcome any major fears lately, or are there any anxieties that you continue to struggle with?  What small steps do you take to deal with your fears? 

10 Things, vol 25

10 Things is my weekly list of things that are making me smile right now. Please add your own grin-inducing items and events in the comments! I'd love to hear what's making your life more happy.

Doesn't this just look serene? Calgon, take me away! 

Image source

1. Gus, the most calm, unruffled cat in the history of moving.  Not a single meow on the way over here in his cat carrier, and a really quick adjustment to his temporary crowded space.  It will be great when he can come out into the rest of the apartment

2. Generous friends issuing invitations for dinner, football watching/knitting time, gelato dates, and other chances to get out of the house while it's in mid-move disarray

3. Awesome friends who powered up and down flights of stairs with all my heavy items on Tuesday and Wednesday, staying cheerful the entire time and taking over the logistics when I gave them the reins

4. The extremely calm and helpful friend I called when I got on the wrong freeway Thursday night and very nearly drove myself to St. Louis. Clearly all my friends are completely kick-ass

5. A late night peanut butter and jelly sandwich that just hits the spot

6. The ease of changing your address online - instant gratification

7. This sock

8. Talking to my sisters on the phone and finding out that their lives are currently full of happy adventures

9. Zipcar. Man, that is so convenient

10. The fabulous Weepies, whose Tuesday night concert just made me love them even more

Also? Their stage set was the cutest thing ever - a mini nighttime cityscape, a tree, a crescent moon, a mobile of paper stars, and lighting to mimic the night sky. The whole show made me so happy.